Monday, May 30, 2016

read:"bespoke in the ravenous desires of the day"

bespoke
in the ravenous desires of the day
that man cannot merely sustain upon material course
for the soul invariably seeks beyond the
safe confines of sustenance
to the lofty
and divine

the stone thrown as declarative
the dust rose as epigram
and you, the same, exampled
by feeding from the same strange stage
where, lunatics all, expel their cordial exaltations
that provide where all other forms of fancy fail
and the heart hungers
to ingest

lines aloud from trembling ink
(or we fail where our minds outraces the form)
desire to fill the spaces bread cannot sate:
a repast fulfilled
from passion's pate.

- a poem for H---- in response to a conversation regarding open mic nights and Dizzee Rascal at Huntington Library, 22nd August 2014

hear:"You Done Lost Your Good Thing Now" BB King



Oh, baby you done lost your good thing now
Oh, baby you done lost your good thing now
Well the way I used to love you baby
Baby that's the way I hate you now
You used to say that you loved me
But baby I believe you've changed your mind
You used to say that you loved me
But baby I believe you've changed your mind
Well I don't blame you baby
Because you ain't what you used to be
Let me love you just one more time
Yes let me love you just one more time anyway
Oh, let me love you, let me love you, let me love you
One more time baby
Let me love you just one more time anyway
Oh you can't quit me now baby
Because you didn't mean me no good anyway
Well you know where I'm from baby
So please don't try to mistreat me
Yes you know where I'm from baby
So please don't try to mistreat me
Yes because I'll make your mother a present
Baby of you and your casket too
Oh you once said you loved me
And you would do anything I said
Oh you once said you loved me baby
And you would do anything I said
Oh but the way you treat me now baby
I just soon rather be dead
Oh, baby you done lost your good thing now
Oh, baby you done lost your good thing now
The way I used to love you
Baby that's the way I hate you now

     - BB King, 1961's My Kind of Blues (EMI, Capital)

Sunday, May 15, 2016

listen:to all about you, the music

Henry Lawson (1867 ~ 1922) is one of the preeminent poets of Australia, with over 25 collected works within his lifetime.  He was also deaf.  He had taken ill at the age of 9 where the decline in his hearing started with a severe fever.  His hearing radically diminished fully by the age of 14.  Attempts to restore his hearing, through the age of 20 were not successful.

Lawson's poems are fiercely republican in nature.

"After All" ~ 1896

The light of passion in dreamy eyes, and a page of truth well read,
The glorious thrill in a heart grown cold of the spirit I thought was dead,
A song that goes to a comrade's heart, and a tear of pride let fall --
And my soul is strong! and the world to me is a grand world after all!

Let our enemies go by their old dull tracks,
and theirs be the fault or shame
(The man is bitter against the world who has only himself to blame);
Let the darkest side of the past be dark, and only the good recall;
For I must believe that the world, my dear, is a kind world after all.

"The Shape of a Song" by Martin Wattenberg
It well may be that I saw too plain, and it may be I was blind;
But I'll keep my face to the dawning light,
though the devil may stand behind!
Though the devil may stand behind my back, I'll not see his shadow fall,
But read the signs in the morning stars of a good world after all.

Rest, for your eyes are weary, girl -- you have driven the worst away --
The ghost of the man that I might have been is gone from my heart to-day;
We'll live for life and the best it brings till our twilight shadows fall;
My heart grows brave, and the world, my girl, is a good world after all.


http://www.visualcomplexity.com/vc/blog/?p=811 - visualization of music for the hearing impaired.

Monday, May 9, 2016

abstract:"the softer touch"

a softer touch, none was better,
a lighter reach,
was all was had
in the sunlight, never course
through your sanded hair
the moment
short
and full.

the air lived hopeful,
intent assured,
fostered and cared for
a lightning bug
cast on the treeline
now
is gone.

pray then, say it thrice
hollow flesh, like an empty
meal
the latest tribes
are gallows
hid
along the
treeline's
course.

- may 9, '16

Frida - Candid 

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

read:excerpt "Flask and Gritted Teeth"...

... Calamansi.  It's name in the Philippines, though I'm not sure if it is unique to us or not.  He sipped at it, a Kumquat Whiskey Sour.

"Lemon, lime, kumquats, gomme, Old Grand-Dad."  Stewart leaned into him to intimate it, fighting over Lauv's Reforget.  Gomme was simply syrup.  Old was bourbon.  Wart knows I know.  No one else would, or very few at least.

A pick-me-up.  Citrus has that affectation.  He stared out the window and wished for a moment that he didn't see the facade of another building.  It was as if every window looked out on a mirror.  Little variation.  He sipped again and let that thought go.

"We let it go now I'm full of rum and regret, I go out just so I can reforget."  The booth synced a bass hook and added some low end.  Familiar.  Bum.  Bum.  Boom.  Chainsmokers, that's what it is.  Roses.  Sip.  Menthol.  Crisp and sharp.

Fuck.  He loosened up and felt his shoulders relax.  Finally.  "I go out just so I can reforget"  The air felt new tonight.  Finally.  Looking down on the street he saw the mulling throng.

"You bored?"  Bailey.  He leaned over beside him.  He pulled on a vape.  It glowed purple then white.  The vapor filled the air, only for two seconds and disappeared.

His mind was actually racing.  He was thinking of flat desert.  Dark nights with only a few, lonely lights in the landscape.  Home.  Cucamonga.  The dark of the San Gabriels ever present.  "What did you want to do when you were a kid?"

Bailey laughed, "What?"

"All I ever wanted to do was fly a jet in the Air Force.  A pilot."  He leaned over the railing more.  "I used to read piloting manuals when I was a kid.  I understood none of it.  I had them open and I would read the words, but they would never cement in my head.  It was like trying to pretend to read hieroglyphics or something, you know?"

Bailey had disappeared.  He does that.  "Then it dawned on me: I just wanted to fly.  I had no commitment to do the work.  I wanted to play.  I wanted to go.  I never really put in the time."  I wanted to soar over the mountain, through the valley on the other side where the trains blew through, three times a day.  Across the hidden lakes where they were inaccessible, to the snow caps that were just as impassable.  I wanted to travel back in time and meet the natives and shove edibles in my mouth and wake up with the knowledge of the world in my head and they would say 'you have no eyes, because now you see everything...

The world was gone for a minute and returned.  Someone screamed on the street below and the mulling of people naturally made a circle around the source.  Homeless, a wash of uneven grey, and teetering along the street - the tourists from Boise and Raleigh making sure to put ten feet between them.  Some are laughing and laughing again when they realize  they have a story to tell when they get home.

Kitten, thank God.  They won't play them until the end though.  He'll play until before the bridge and cut to anything else.  "Give me the lights now, let me breathe."

"What was that thing you hit me earlier?  Something about a bad day?"  Oh, the text.

"A Joker quote."

Bailey laughed again.  He was on something and that something was annoying.  "What?"

"It's from The Killing Joke, I lent it to you back in 8th grade.  You read it and it blew your mind."

"Ok."  He waited with his face flat and his eyes glossy.  It wasn't alcohol.  Bailey stared until he got an answer.

"Joker says to Batman, 'All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy.  That's how far the world is from where I am."

"Just one bad day."  Bailey slapped my chest when he got it and did a quick hop into the air.  Now it was time for him to disappear.  All right, I'm done for the night.  He nodded to Stewart on the way out and threw a 20 on the bar for him.  The drinks were free because they were tight.   ...

watch/feel:"Writer's Block" Ben Watts...

Monday, May 2, 2016

passages:"Bang Bang"


“How little we know of what there is to know. I wish that I were going to live a long time instead of going to die today because I have learned much about life in these four days; more, I think than in all other time. I'd like to be an old man to really know. I wonder if you keep on learning or if there is only a certain amount each man can understand. I thought I knew so many things that I know nothing of. I wish there was more time.”
― Ernest Hemingway, For Whom The Bell Tolls

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears...in...rain. Time to die.
- attrib. Rutger Hauer, Blade Runner

“I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out. I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.”

― Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar