NaNoWriMo "Freeway 1979"

Here's an excerpt from the novel I'm using as part of NaNoWriMo by 11/30, "Freeway 1979".  It was a script several years ago that was far from being fully fleshed out, so this has been a lesson in how to turn a script into narrative form.

The story follows an illegal street race on Highway 5 in California, extending from south LA to Tijuana Mexico.  Fourteen hopefuls vie for an opportunity in a time where gas and jobs are hard to come by.  Trevor Bogues puts his vagrant father's '69 GTO up in the race along with his friend Carey as his navigator.  It's a deadly race but with a substantial kitty for the winner.  It'll be the step for Trevor to turn his world of crap around, if he can out race and out think the competitors and the underworld organization that finds the race and the lives of its hopefuls mere toys.

...

                Carey keyed the radio again, “How do you copy for that Duster?”  Vincent was staying out of it, he must be loving watching the drivers squirm.  Carey was getting pissed at the crew.  He hated the boss and all of his minions for that reason: they’re waiting for them to fuck up for their own enjoyment.  “Haze, any idea on the pig chatter?  Anything we need to worry about?”  Make them do some fucking work.  He looked over at Trevor, “For all we know this could be some big fucking dragnet for their own pleasure.”  He shouldn’t have said it now, but he was lit like a torch.

                “You’re saying that now?”

                Carey put his finger up to answer so what.  He lit a cig and lit one for Trevor too, “One thing I kept in mind, and you can too, we can leave anytime.  This is a big freeway, we only need to pull off and go home.  Any sign of them dicking us in the ass, and trust me, I’ll call it before you.”  He handed over the cigarette and leaned back in his seat, "I know these guys too well."

                Trevor felt more confidence at this. They were in this together, that’s for sure.

                Pete came up on the radio [from the Duster], “We’re taking the Euros advice.”

                “Copy that,” Carey put the radio down.  “That’s good, we can’t have their stink on the rest of us.  It’s been smooth sailing so far.  Better for them to figure it out so we can continue."

                “I worry about [Cindy].”  Trevor squirmed in his seat, “She’s too reckless.”

                “That’s what makes the boys like her.”

                “Yeah, too many boys.  Too many toys.  Too many times she plays with fire.”

                “She’s a big girl.”
                “The bigger they are…”

                Trevor pushed the GTO forward once he was able to come around to civilians that were running neck and neck, well below the 55 mph speed limit.  Why be on the freeway if you can't go the bare minimum speed?

                "Stand-by for it, Trev.  That Camaro is up ahead there somewhere."

                But can I get the lead again?

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